Forgetting fiance?

Let me tell you one of the proofs that my mind isn’t working properly these days.

After a few private messages back and forth with a few online sellers at LYN forum, today I found a rather good deal of Lumix TZ10 model, and even better, he got one in stock with brown color. So I was confident that I’m getting it, despite I didnt aim for TZ10 before this as it was the most expensive currently among the TZ series and I dont actually need the GPS function. But anyways. And my serviced apartment business is getting well lately and I’ve actually gained some good bucks with customers I got from my website whom I outsourced to some other apartment owners. I mean, apart the amount deserved by my mum as the owner of ours, the rest is totally my wages! :D So that’s the reason I feel the itch to get a rather neat camera now, especially I want to declare it as a gift upon finishing my master’s project ^_^ (or maybe, it’s our (me and Az) gift to ourselves.. as he apparently wants to pay half for it :P)

Okay the thing I meant to tell you was, this seller didnt provide delivery by mail, so I was thinking to ask Az to pick up the camera at his shop in KL. And when I was replying his msg, I wrote “Okay, after I do payment I will ask my bf to collect the camera as I’m in Penang.” and I paused, thinking should just I write friend instead of boyfriend in this message? Nah, he’s my boyfriend lah so I’d just write bf ^_^ and sent the message, got reply from the seller that I need to describe my bf when he comes to collect so that he wont pass the camera to a wrong person, etc etc.

And I called Az happily telling that I was determined to buy the camera now, and I told the same thing I wrote to the seller.. “I informed the seller that I’d ask my boyfriend to collect the camera, bla, bla, bla.. so you can go sg wang or not?, bla, bla..”

Okay, and 4-5 hours passed, and only just now I realized.

OMG, he’s not my boyfriend, he’s my fiance T_T

OMG OMG. I have a fiance, why I forgot one? Adoi..

I cant even be sure that for these few hours I’ve forgotten the fact that Az has been my fiance since almost two months.. maybe I  have always forgotten it all times!! >.< except only when I was reminded in a way or another during our phone conversation, or the wedding stuff my mum has been talking to me, etc etc, but I have to admit that it’s not firmly registered in my mind yet, the fact that I’m engaged to Az. Does this happen to other people too?

Is this a crime, this silly forgetness? And does it actually matter? Maybe not much, but suddenly I cant help but feel bad, for forgetting such simple thing yet BIG fact, especially I know that Az likes to mention every now and then, addressing me as his fiance.

Or maybe I’m just too overloaded with Fuzzy readings and writing right now so I myself have been fuzzified with transition of having a boyfriend and having a fiance. (though when I think again, it was also fuzzy during transition of friend and boyfriend before, no?).

I do feel sorry, to anyone who has a fiance like me.. and to Az, I’m so sorry and it wasnt intended but you have to face the fact that you have a forgetful fiance. I just hope that it wont happen in future that I would forget that I have a husband.. heh. Otherwise it would be really weird, I guess.

Malay Engagement

I’m making this post for my friends outside Malaysia who might be clueless of the photos I put in last post regarding our engagement ceremony.

First off, the Malay engagement is more a family event than just a marriage proposal. Az’s family came all the way from their hometown for this purpose, bringing a number of gifts called hantaran. They are usually sweets like chocolate and cakes, fruits, clothings, accessories, as well as the engagement rings, all decorated prettily in a container. I dont know why this custom exists but it’s been around as long as I can remember. I’m personally thinking those are unnecessary, but since the family seem to ‘take over’ our engagement, therefore we just have to follow what they prepare for us =_=

And the ceremony usually begins with discussion among the parents or family representative, regarding the fact that their son & daughter are now engaged, followed by discussion of when and how the marriage (wedding!) will be held. So theoretically, they have come up with a date (or at least, month) but in between workloads of my master’s project right now I’m still in denial about it =.=; fearing that the expectations will turn from happy to nightmare, if I cant seem to get my Master’s done on time. Yep, we do agree that this came in a very wrong time. But as how I met Az, everything has always been unexpected, surprising, totally out of the blue! I really dont know, whether I’m so much ready for all these, then again I realized that it’s not important to think about that anymore as long as I’m happy.

After the discussion, there comes the time I received the engagement ring from Az’s mother.

Yes, it’s the mother who gives me the ring. Not him.

And same goes to Az, he received the engagement ring from my father.

And after that, the photography sessions, though mostly among the bunch of the family members. And then comes the food :)

Now you might be wondering, where’s the time of him proposing to me? Isn’t engagement is when a guy proposes to his girl? Yup, it’s practiced, but I guess it’s optional here since the family may be the first to suggest that their kids should be engaged. And even if a guy proposes to a girl beforehand, this kind of famiy-ish engagement ceremony will instantly come later.

So by the time this event ended, he still owed me the “typical” proposal. Of course, there have been talks regarding marriage plan and he wants to marry me and blablabla but I was expecting a proper romantic proposal like you see in movies!!!!!! ^_^

And during our quick escape to town after the family event ended, before I dropped him to car, and even though it was (again) unexpected, he did it. Proposed to me :)